So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize