walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
