What did we do last night that was yellow?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
