i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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