I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
it was like his penis was on wheels.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
