I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dicks are not precious.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize