I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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