I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
