She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
My vagina just clenched in fear
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