He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
