the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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