It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I am midnight drunk by noon
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
