Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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