I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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