Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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