Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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