I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
What a dumb baby whore.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Randomize
