Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
