Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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