Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
