So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
