Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
just tell him i said nine months
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
