dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Is it because I queefed?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
