I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
