Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
