Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
