Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
