is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
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