College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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