this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
