So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize