remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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