Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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