i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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