I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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