she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
