Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
