Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize