dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
