i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Randomize
