During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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