I'm so fucking centered right now
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
