We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
