brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
