Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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