Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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