I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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