Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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