Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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