I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Randomize