You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize